The Hyrulian world of BOTW is littered – that sounds a tad judgmental – replete with villains and monsters and thing that not only go “bump” in the night but will just as likely bump Link on the head and leave a big red X splotch on the map indicating where he last died. In our other musings we’ve touched on Moldugas, Guardians, Lynels, the occasional Stalnox, and various others. Today, we’re reserving center stage for three additional monsters: Hinox, Talus, and Bears.
We know, we know: Bears aren’t really a monster. But they were necessary for the literary allusion to the Wizard of Oz, so cut us some slack, Gentle Reader.
We also know, or at least we suspect, that the plural of Talus is Tali, but that also ruins the allusion, and we’re not sure it’s a Latin-based word in the first place. And “Hinoxes” is hard to say. Again with some slack- cutting, Reader.
One other thing we know and then, we promise, on with the blog! This isn’t a post littered, even replete, with tips and tricks for defeating the Hinox, Talus, or Bear that wanders your way. It just felt like a topic that needed writing about, because we quite like these three creatures. (Demelza here rushes in to point out she does NOT like a Talus, not with green eggs and ham or any other way, but about that more in a moment, so please sit down, Demelza, and stop reaching for the keyboard.)
The Sleeping Hinox Giant
Derived no doubt from the Cyclops of Greek mythology (snooty reference herein included to compensate for Wizard of Oz reference, above), the Hinox is a one-eyed beast who sleeps a lot. These giants also wear necklaces made of weapons you want, and they are a veritable cornucopia filled with treats which you can have when they explode, much like our friend the Molduga. You’ll stumble upon them in repose in many a corner of Hyrule; load up your favorite interactive map if you want to go hunting.
Demelza: I can’t find the interactive map!
Itzal: Not now, Demelza.
Demelza: But where is the interactive map? I can never find it when we need it.
Itzal: We do not, in point of fact, need it just now.
Demelza:
Once you have found your interactive map and, one assumes, a sleeping Hinox, kill it. (The Hinox, not the map, Demelza.) Shoot out its one eye as quickly as you can; once it wakes up, it’s always covering the eye with its fat hands. You can try sneaking up, paragliding in, resting in its hand so when it scratches its nose, it carries you along and you can – well – kill it. Just have at it! We confess to feeling a mite bad about battling the Hinox, as it’s ridiculously easy to dispatch, being a great lumbering fellow whose main defense is to sit on you. But, we don’t feel so guilty that we’re not going to enjoy all those treats it drops! They can be used for all sorts of armor upgrades and what-not. (And who doesn’t like a little what-not to go with one’s Greek mythology knockoffs, right?)
Talus (Tali, Taluses, Whatever)
You will find the Stone Talus and its cousins the Igneo and Frost Talus quite literally littered about Hyrule. They are giant rocks, you see, and they lie in your path when you least expect them. (Igneo and Frost are made of lava and ice, respectively, so if you expect them in Eldin and Hebra, then you have great expectations. As it were.)
A talus – there, that avoids this plurality thing quite nicely – will kill you. They are not at all like the kinder, gentler Hinox. Demelza believes they are the very worst beast in Hyrule. She and Itzal had quite a spirited discussion about whether a Talus is worse than a Lynel; it sounded rather like two nine-year-olds arguing over whether Superman or Batman is better. (Superman, clearly; Lynels just as clearly.) (Demelza would like to dispute the ASS-umption in this example that she supports Batman. She casts her vote for Wonder Woman. And there is no disputing that Wonder Woman – unlike Itzal – would make short work of a Lynel, while a Talus could give her a spot of trouble.)
The Talus does have a smaller cousin, called pebblits or tribblets or something equally cute, for all the cousin in question is not remotely cute. They, too, come in icy and fiery versions in addition to the ordinary joe. However, unlike their nasty large relatives, the pebblits are easy enough to pick up and throw; when you do, they’ll explode and give you rare gems and stones. But just stay the heck away from the big ones. No side quest is worth the battle. No droppings are worth the certain defeat. Live to fight another day, and all that.
Da Bears
We’d really like to say we’re scared of the Bears, but we’re not. They are quite funny. And one can ride them, just like a horse or a deer! And also they can kill you, we expect; we didn’t wait around to find out. They come in two varieties, honeyvore (don’t let the name fool you) and grizzlymaw (let the name scare you). And that’s pretty much all we have to say about bears: Let us just remember they are appearing in this blog as a nod to Dorothy Gale (really to Judy Garland) and not make a big fuss about them.
So, there they are: Hinox and Talus and Bears, oh my! They’re not the lyrics to a popular show tune, and they’ll most likely kill you in the morning (or the afternoon, or the evening, or the dead of night). But they are a few of our favorite things.
And now this blog has far too many literary, cinematic, and show tune allusions. But the sun’ll come out tomorrow and – oh, never mind.